went out 'visiting' for hari raya with my primary school friends (fadiana, kamariya, genevieve and fyawilda), and it sucked. i mean, it had been two years since the last time we met, and we've all changed.. 80% of the girls in my primary sch malay class went to St Joseph's Convent, and i dunno what's been going on in their lives, and yesterday, they did not seem to be interested in filling me in. and i felt awkward cuz i'm in different school with way different academic standards, and being around them (although genevieve's like, more cleverer than me), i felt as if i need to watch my words and my actions, if not they wud be like, "and she goes to tkgs..?" well, in fya's hse, i was being (truthfully) blur abt something, then they kinda explained (in a quite annoyed voice) and said "pakailah otak tu" which means "use your brain la". now do you get what mean abt not being myself around them?my frens know that i'm a naturally blur person sometimes... that's just me. fine, i might be over reacting, but i wanna get it off my chest.

it's like i dunno them anymore. they've turned into these completely different person! i was dreading the whole thing straight from the first house we went. i was sooooooo desperately wishing i was back home, chatting and joking with my family...

when we went to my house, it was soooo awkward... everyone was quite, not knowing what to say to each other, then my mom came down and started chatting to them... i must admit i was quite embarrassed with some questions my mom asked them..

and then when they all went home, i tell you i felt soo relieved.. and i kinda appreciate my secondary school friends and my family more than before. not sure why. maybe i'm relieved that at least i dun lead an awkward life with ALL my friends and relatives....